


And My Heart Went "Boom!"

by radio_antlers



Category: Lumberjanes
Genre: F/F, april and jo only like it because of angelica schulyer, based on a very specific hc, i apparently don't know how to write a good summary either, i still don't know how to tag, mal doesn't really like musicals but "hamilton" is the exception, molly would totally love this musical, nor does she care, ripley has no idea what her friends are talking about, she's definitely a history buff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:47:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28491126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/radio_antlers/pseuds/radio_antlers
Summary: Let's get something straight here: Mal isn't a theater geek by any means whatsoever. But the soft smile on Molly's lips and the illuminated excitement in her eyes was totally worth keeping this soundtrack on her iPod.
Relationships: Mal Yoo/Molly (Lumberjanes)
Kudos: 7





	1. The Main Soundtrack

**Author's Note:**

> SO, this was based on a very specific headcannon I have about Molly, and that is that she would most definitely love "Hamilton," because it's wrapped around a major historical event, and she seems like the history-nerd type. Also, this entire fic may or may not have been me just self projecting onto Molly, heh heh...I *totally* didn't cry during "Dear Theodosia."
> 
> Anyway, hope you enjoy! Comments, kudos, and bookmarks are very much appreciated!

“I wanna show you something.”

Molly glanced up from her book, her vibrant green eyes immediately locking with Mal’s deep brown ones. A small, enticing smile was plastered on her face as she sat down on the bottom bunk, which had recently been occupied by the blonde for the past few nights. Normally, Molly would be pretty peeved if someone interrupted her reading (more like broken her immersion in a _fictional_ world, whatever you wanna call it), but when people said they had something to show you, it was normally worth a moment of your time.

“And what would that be, exactly?” Molly replied with a coy grin, closing her book and scooting over so Mal could sit beside her.

“Okay, so you know that I really like _music_ , obviously, and I know that you really like _history,”_ Mal began to explain, to which Molly gave a confirming nod. “Well, I think I’ve got something that combines the two!”

Mal reached into one of the pockets of her vest, and with a flourish, pulled out her iPod and a pair of earbuds, much to her girlfriend’s astonishment.

“You know you’re not supposed to have that, right?” Molly asked, looking between the little piece of tech and her girlfriend. She wasn’t sure _why_ she was so surprised; Mal _was_ pretty punk, and this _was_ a _really_ punkish thing to do, sneaking forbidden electronics and all.

The other girl just dryly chuckled, playfully rolling her eyes. “I _know,_ Molls, but Jen won’t be back from her counselor’s meeting for another couple hours, so there’s a slim chance that I’m gonna get caught. And besides, this is totally gonna be worth it! Trust me, okay?”

Molly nodded again, and Mal passed her an earbud and turned the iPod on, continuing to explain. “Have you heard of a musical called _“Hamilton?”_ ” She asked, and Molly shook her head, although she _did_ know a lot about the American Revolution. It had been one of her favorite sections in her history units. “It’s basically the story of the Revolution, but as a big-box, Broadway production. I, uh, thought you’d might wanna give it a listen, seeing as history seems to be one of your many strong suits.”

Yeah, that was kinda true. Molly wasn’t the biggest fan of musical theater, but she had plowed through a handful of history novels in her fifteen years of living and enjoyed most of them.

“Sure,” Molly accepted, slipping the cool plastic into her ear. “Why not?”

Mal smiled again, tucking her own earbud into her ear and pressing _“play”_ on the first song, goosebumps crawling over her skin as the familiar melody filled her mind. Let’s get one thing clear here: Mal is _not_ a theater geek, okay? She didn’t have dreams of starring in a huge show onstage or winning a Tony or _anything_ of the sort. Heck, she didn’t even download the soundtrack because she was _interested_ in it in the first place; she downloaded it because the American Revolution unit was coming up in history class during freshman year, and her friends – not to mention _countless_ people online – claimed that listening to this helped them pass. She _kept it_ on her iPod because she ended up kinda enjoying it. What? The songs were the epitome of _catchy._

Just as Hamilton entered the song, Mal wrapped her arm around Molly’s waist, delighted to see that when she glanced over, she seemed to be enjoying the music. Or maybe it was the gentle physical contact from Mal making her smile; I guess we’ll never know.

And they were off, embarking on a theatrical journey through the Revolution, from the safety of their cabin. This was going to be a rather fun way to kill two hours and twenty-two minutes.

XxXxX

Holy Ella Fitzgerald. This was amazing.

Molly had never heard anything quite like this before. Well, to be _completely fair,_ she described most music as something she’d never heard anything quite like before. Her parents weren’t too terribly fond of music, or anything that made noise, really. They didn’t even own a _radio,_ which Molly had come to realize was a pretty common household item.

It was like history was playing out right inside her head, in a way that was so much more magnificent than it had been when she read about it. She felt like she was standing right there in New York, 1776, watching Hamilton and Burr meet for the first time, seeing a side of the story that was _way_ less gruesome and devastating than the books had made it seem. It was fast, loud, theatrical, and Molly loved every second of it.

Being snuggled up close to Mal was also pretty great, too.

Both girls were propped up against the headboard of the bottom bunk, Mal’s arm wrapped around Molly’s waist and Molly’s head on Mal’s shoulder. Their eyes were half-closed, and their breathing was calm and slow; if someone walked into the Roanoke cabin and laid eyes on the two, they’d probably think they were asleep. Bubbles had crawled down from Molly’s head and was now curled up in her lap, _actually_ asleep. Mal was just happy that she’d found another thing her and her favorite person could bond over. Molly was happy because she could tell her mother that she _did_ spend some of her time at camp being (somewhat) academic. And that Mal had introduced her to this great new thing.

And that peaceful, calm, stillness would’ve continued, but April, Jo, and Ripley decided that _then_ was the _perfect time_ to excitedly burst through the cabin door.

“Oh, my _gosh,_ that was so wild!” April exclaimed, walking backwards so she was still facing the other two girls. Her hair was frizzy and entangled with leaves and little pebbles, her clothes were damp and sandy, and she held her black flats in one hand, using the other to make exaggerated hand gestures as she raved about how freaky whatever the trio had just got back from doing had been. She hadn’t even _noticed_ Mal and Molly yet, but they had _definitely_ noticed her; frankly, it would’ve been hard not to.

“Hey, friends,” Mal greeted, a heckuva lot quieter than April had been. Molly was still lying by her side, lost in the music, and Mal intended to keep it that way. As much as she loved her friends, she loved having quiet time with Molly _slightly_ more. “What just happened?”

Jo sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “We met up with the mermaids again, and April got overexcited. I’ll let you guess what happened after that.”

“It was awesome!” Ripley tacked on. She looked just as messy as April did; she even still had some kelp wrapped around her arms and left leg, which was one of the most uncomfortable things the rest of the Roanokes have ever seen. “I got to play hero!”

“April got tangled in the kelp, and because Ripley has all of her knot-tying badges, it was only logical that she be the one to go and save her.”

The redhead in question just shuddered. She would never forget the feeling of the cold, slimy kelp wrapping around her ankles. Instead of focusing on that _awful_ ordeal, she shifted her attention to what her other two cabinmates were doing. “Aww, look at you two! Being all adora- “she abruptly stopped when her amber eyes landed on the shiny piece of metal Mal’s knuckles were wrapped around. “Mal! Where the _junk_ did you get that?!”

Mal shrugged. “I brought it with me when I came to camp, and there was something on here I wanted to show Molly.”

“And what would _that_ be?”

_“Hamilton.”_

Jo and April exchanged amused glances at the mention of the musical, leaving Ripley to try and figure out why her friends looked like they’d just won the lottery. “What’s _“Hamilton?”_ ” She asked, running a hand through her damp blue bangs.

“Um, only one of the _best_ musicals _ever!”_ Jo replied. “How far along are you guys?”

“Just finished _“The Story of Tonight,”_ ” Molly mumbled from Mal’s shoulder. “I really liked it.”

April gasped. “That means you’re about to hear _“The Schuyler Sisters!”_ Molly, you’re going to _love it!”_ That was April’s favorite song.

“Oh, please,” Jo scoffed, “that song, although one of the better ones, has absolutely _nothing_ on _“Satisfied.”_ That one is just a musical masterpiece.”

“I still have no idea what you guys are talking about.”

Mal decided to fill Ripley in, quickly pausing the music, much to her girlfriend’s discouragement. Molly, as April would put it, had been vibing. “It’s a Broadway musical about the American Revolution, more specifically Alexander Hamilton.”

“Oh,” Ripley nodded. “I’m _slightly_ less confused now.”

April and Jo would’ve gone on arguing about which Angelica Schulyer song was best, but Jo can actually pick up on social cues, and figured that Mal and Molly probably wanted to continue the musical in some form of peace and quiet. “Okay, whatever, this debate is going to go on _forever,_ and I’m sure that Mal, Molly, and Ripley don’t want to listen to it. Also, you and Ripley need to go was that junk out of your hair.”

Reluctantly, April and Ripley trudged back out of the cabin, with April trying to educate Ripley on the musical and historical _icons_ that were Angelica, Eliza, and Peggy Schulyer. The remaining three Roanokes giggled to themselves, knowing full well that everything April was spewing to the younger camper was just going in one ear and out the other.

“Alright, I’m gonna get going,” Jo said, standing by the doorframe. “There’s another mechanics badge I wanna earn before dinner.”

“Good luck!” Molly said quietly, the corners of her mouth upturning into a faint smile.

“Thanks,” Jo smiled back. “Enjoy your musical! And, uh, Mal? You warned her about act two, right?”

“She already knows what happens, Jo. Molls over here is _very_ informed on the Revolution.” Mal shot Molly a playful wink, making her face flush a soft shade of pink.

“Oh. Still, I wouldn’t get too attached to anyone.”

And with that, Jo left, shutting the cabin door behind her. Molly was a little puzzled by her words, thinking that the musical couldn’t really make historical events any more depressed-sounding than books already do, and pushed Jo’s warning to the back of her mind. Mal, on the other hand, prepared herself to see her girlfriend go from being happy about this new discovery to being smacked in the feels. Mal hadn’t even been too into it the first time she’d listened to it all the way through and _she_ was still left feeling down afterwards.

But we aren’t quite there yet. This is still kind of a campy musical.

“Shall we proceed?” Mal asked, to which Molly nodded enthusiastically. She was hoping that they’d be able to finish the soundtrack before Jen got back. Or maybe they’d run out of time and Molly would have to persuade Jen into letting them finish it. Just as long as she got to listen to the rest.

XxXxX

Over the next handful of songs, Molly found out two things: she agreed with April that _“The Shculyer Sisters”_ was _amazing_ and _“Farmer Refuted”_ was hilarious.

She didn’t really have an opinion on _“You’ll be Back”_ or _“Right Hand Man,”_ but they weren’t bad songs by any means, just not her favorites. She _did_ have a least favorite so far, by the way, and she had a feeling it was probably one of Mal’s least favorites, too. Both of them couldn’t help but _cringe_ at _“A Winter’s Ball”_ because of a rather distasteful (in their opinion) lyric; I think you know which one I’m referring to.

But then came _“Helpless.”_ And _wow,_ did Molly _love_ this song! Rather, a certain _lyric._

_“And you walked in and my heart went boom!” _

“That’s how I felt on the first day of camp.”

Molly immediately clapped a hand over her mouth and sat straight up, startled by the string of words that just fell from her lips and by how _effortlessly_ they did. Her entire face turned scarlet as she heard Mal giggle, and when she looked over she realized that Mal’s blush was just as bad. She felt a pair of her arms encircle her waist again and Mal press soft kisses to her cheek and her forehead, making the color splashed across Molly’s face deepen (if that was even possible).

“Mol, that’s the actual sweetest thing I’ve heard,” Mal murmured, enjoying the flustered look on her girlfriend’s face as she coaxed her pale hand away from her face. “You’re so _cute.”_

“So are you,” she replied, her head falling back on Mal’s shoulder. Her attention slowly dripped back to the song, her mind falling back into 1780, at the Winter’s Ball, where Eliza and Angelica were both pining after the same rebel and Peggy had just disappeared. She was glad she was never going to have to go through this with _her_ sisters – thank Barbra Streisand they were _significantly_ younger than her.

Her opinion on the best Angelica Schulyer song was challenged when she heard _“Satisfied,”_ but she still decided that she was going to side with April on this one. _“The Story of Tonight (Reprise)”_ was tacked on to her mental list of favorite songs, along with _“Wait For It.”_ Molly had also come to terms with the fact that she had a favorite _character_ (which felt kinda weird, considering that these characters were _real_ historical figures), which was John Laurens. Mal proceeded to thank the gods that _“Laurens Interlude”_ didn’t make it to the recording studio.

_“Ten Duel Commandments”_ was another one that Molly quite enjoyed, along with _“Guns and Ships,”_ which was when Mal informed her that that was one of – if not _the –_ most difficult raps to execute. Molly vowed that she’d get it down by the end of the summer.

Honestly, she’d never been happier. _This_ was _truly_ what Molly would call a perfect day at camp. No whacky monsters, no near-death adventures; just her and Mal, together, hanging out in the cabin, doing something mundane and calm for once. I mean, the use of forbidden technology and faint anxiety that tinted the mood because they could get caught at any moment hadn’t been a part of this fantasy, but oh well.

It was quiet, comfy, and everything Molly could ask for.

XxXxX

It happened. Tragedy struck. The odd part? They weren’t even at the _beginning_ of the second act yet. But Molly was all choked up and the only thing that could’ve possibly caused it was the music.

The culprit was _“Dear Theodosia,”_ which just made this even stranger. That was supposed to be a wholesome song, a break from all the chaos. It was supposed to tug at your heartstrings, but all it took was for Mal to glance over at Molly near the end of the song to see that it did a _little more_ than just _tug._

Tears were collecting in the corners of Molly’s jade eyes and her lower lip was caught between her teeth. Mal instantly paused the music and ripped out her earbud, shifting onto her knees and cupping Molly’s face in her hand, wiping away the tears trickling down her face with the pad of her thumb.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” She asked, her voice hushed. “Is everything okay?”

Molly shook her head. “I’m sorry,” she squeaked, “it’s stupid. The song isn’t even sad. It’s nothing.”

“If your _crying,_ it’s not nothing. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, I just want to make sure you’re alright.”

The blonde sucked in a shaky breath, wrapping her fingers around Mal’s wrist, keeping her hand on her cheek. Her fingers twitched against the leathery bracelets decorating the other girl’s forearm. “It’s just,” she began, her eyebrows furrowing as she tried to find the right words, “it’s so _nice_ and _sweet_ and they seem like such _good parents,_ history be darned. And it’s so _weird_ and _difficult_ to listen to for whatever reason.”

She knew the reason, she would never be able to _forget_ that reason, but talking about it would only make things worse right now and she didn’t want Mal to deal with her in that…uncomfortable state, as she’d been calling it for the past couple years. Molly just wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand and took in a couple deeper breaths.

“I’m okay,” Molly whispered, running a hand over Bubbles’ fur. “I’m sorry, I-I shouldn’t have gotten so worked up.”

“There’s no need to apologize, Molls,” Mal reassured, gently pulling her closer and reclining back on the headboard. “How about we just skip the rest of that song?”

“Good idea,” She replied, nuzzling further into her girlfriend’s embrace, her head resting right in the crook of her neck. Mal’s arm remained wrapped around her waist and didn’t stray until they left for dinner.

XxXxX

Ah, yes, the second act. The first few songs were tame; _“What’d I Miss,”_ although leading into a frightful side of chaos and bloodshed, was one of the jazziest and upbeat songs in this entire musical, and Mal couldn’t help but nod along to _“Cabinet Battle #1,”_ which was probably her favorite song, if she had to pick one.

Molly really enjoyed _“Take a Break.”_ The vocals were amazing and sent chills down her spine, and she adored Phillip’s little poem. It was one of the cutest things she’d ever listened to.

But then came _“Say No to This,”_ and Molly just couldn’t keep her discouragement under wraps.

“This is awful,” she mumbled once the song ended. “I mean, it’s _great_ in terms of sound, but the actual _concept?_ Awful. Granted, I knew this was coming, so I don’t know _why_ I’m so shocked this turned out any different, but still. Hamilton is henceforth _forbidden_ from making decisions. I’m putting my foot down.”

Mal couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re _really_ fired up about this, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” Molly said, sounding so confident in her answer. “I also _really_ dislike her husband. Like, a _lot.”_ Suddenly, a look of dread washed over her face. “Oh, my _gosh,_ what about _Eliza!?”_

The next handful of songs seemed to go by quicker. In what felt like seconds, they’d reached _“Blow Us All Away,”_ and Mal braced herself for heartache. Molly had a feeling that she knew what was coming but was still mostly unaware of the major three punches to the feels she was about to sit through. Mal just hugged her closer.

The three gunshots rang out, and surprisingly, Molly didn’t look all too upset. Probably because she’d previously read about it, but even so, Mal had previously read it in her history class and was still a little hurt by the end of the song. _“Stay Alive (Reprise)”_ went off without a hitch (Molly’s face was still normal), and so did _“It’s Quiet Uptown,”_ even though Mal _swore_ she saw Molly begin to tear up. _No one_ was safe from that song.

April and Ripley made another appearance before the soundtrack was over, and Molly informed April that she thought _“The Schuyler Sisters”_ rocked, much to April’s pleasure. The younger girls were pretty quiet, with Ripley reading a comic book – borrowed from Mal – and April doodling in her notebook.

“Okay,” Mal whispered excitedly, “last three songs! Prepare to feel both broken and complete at the same time!”

Molly giggled. “How does one even feel _both_ at the same time? They’re, like, polar opposites of each other.”

“Trust me, it’s possible, and it’s the most conflicting thing _ever.”_

April and Ripley nodded in agreement. “And it’s even _more_ conflicting because it’s _actual history.”_ The redhead pointed out, the end of her sparkly pink gel pen tapping against her chin.

“You’re about to feel the exact same way I do when I finish an anime,” Ripley chimed in, shooting Molly a sympathetic look from across the room. “May the odds be ever in your favor.”

“Where did you hear _that?_ Does the camp library have _“The Hunger Games”_ now?”

“That information is between only me and the yetis!”

Mal just decided to un-pause the music.

XxXxX

The only thing Molly had to say about _“Best of Wives and Best of Women”_ was _“serves him right,”_ which Mal thought was hilarious, because she sounded entirely serious. She thought Eliza deserved better; always had and always will.

Next up was _“The World Was Wide Enough,”_ which, truth be told, made both of the girls feel a little anxious and on edge. The song was great, but something about the sudden switches between Alexander’s voice and the chaos happening around him just made them feel twitchy. Other than that, it was just kind of sad. Made Molly question the meaning of life and death a little bit.

And finally, _“Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story.”_ What could Molly even _say?_ It was _breathtaking._ Molly couldn’t believe that she hadn’t found out about this musical masterpiece until two hours ago. Don’t get her wrong, she enjoyed simply reading about history, but this was just so much more _immersing_ and, well, _fun!_ She was _totally_ going to have to find a way to listen to this on the down low when she got back home, because just this once was never going to suffice.

“So,” Mal began, turning off her iPod and coiling up the earbuds, “what did you think? Was it to your liking?”

Molly, still dazed by that finale, just nodded, her head still on Mal’s shoulder. “Yes. Holy Elizabeth Schulyer, yes.”

Mal just grinned. “I knew you would. Although, I’m still confused as to _how_ you managed to make it through _“Burn”_ with a straight face. Like, besides _“It’s Quiet Uptown,”_ that’s about as heartbreaking as it gets.”

The archer just shrugged, toying with the tail of her braid. “It _was_ really sad, but I think the guilt Hamilton had to suffer through was far worse. You really can’t come back from that.” She paused, and then whispered something so quietly that Mal wouldn’t have heard it unless Molly was as close to her as she was. “I don’t know if _I’d_ be able to keep _living_ after something like that.”

“You’ll never have to worry about it,” Mal whispered back, tilting Molly’s chin upwards. “I _promise,_ I am yours and yours _alone.”_

Molly blushed and smiled. “I’d hope so.” She closed the tiny gap between them, blissfully enjoying the feeling of Mal holding her close, not caring that April was sitting only a few feet away from them and owned a Polaroid camera. She could barely even hear the loud _click_ of the shutter as the hopeless romantic redhead snapped a photo of them.


	2. That One Extra Song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly discovers one of the songs that wasn't in the recorded soundtrack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just couldn't help myself.

The Roanoke cabin door swung open, knocking against the back wall. Mal and Ripley both looked up from their game of cards, slightly startled by the sudden noise. Molly was standing in the doorframe, a slightly stern look on her face, making Mal raise an eyebrow. Ripley just looked confused as all heck.

“You, uh, okay there, Molly?” She asked. This was weird. Like, _really_ weird.

“Were you or were you _not_ planning on telling me about _“Laurens Interlude?”_ ” She asked, her fingers twitching by her side.

Recently, Mal had introduced Molly to _“Hamilton,”_ a Broadway musical about the American Revolution with a _killer_ soundtrack, and that was coming from Mal, who tended to steer away from showtunes and head straight for the punk genre. Molly had fallen in love with it; Mal had even caught her humming the songs to herself a few times over the past few days. Mostly _“Helpless”_ and _“My Shot,”_ considering they were some of her favorites.

Molly had also taken a strong liking to John Laurens’ portrayal, claiming that if she had to pick, he would probably be her favorite character (after Eliza, of course). After being told this information, Mal had been glad that the song _“Laurens Interlude,”_ the song of his death, hadn’t made it into the recording studio. Molly’s question and slightly upset attitude made sense now.

“Honestly?” Mal began, awkwardly running a hand through her hair and shooting a slightly nervous glance in Ripley’s direction. “I _wasn’t_ planning on it?”

“How come?” Molly demanded.

Ripley blinked. “Is this a _“Hamilton”_ thing?”

The two older girls nodded, and Ripley just hummed in response, her attention shifting back to her and Mal’s card game, using this time to plan her next move. If there was one thing she took seriously, it was Go Fish. She was _very_ determined to win this time.

“Because it would’ve just made you sad!” Mal explained. She paused, a confused look overtaking her face. “Wait a second, how did _you_ find out about it?”

“I may or may not have _“strategically borrowed”_ Jen’s laptop, but that’s besides the point!” Molly spat quickly, her expression changing from slightly peeved to just plain _crestfallen._ “That was the saddest thing I have _ever_ listened to, holy Joan Jett.”

Mal just chuckled. _“You_ used contraband electronics? My Molly? I’m impressed.”

Molly shrugged. “Technically, it wasn’t contraband, but whatever. I regret my decision. I regret it so much.”

Mal got up from the ground and walked over to the door frame, resting her hands comfortingly on her girlfriend’s shoulders. She felt a little bad that she couldn’t wipe the amused grin off of her face, but there was something about this situation that was just, well, kinda funny.

“I know you do, Molls. I know.”


End file.
